It’s raining tonight. Lightning, thunder, the whole nine. It hasn’t really helped much with the heat though. 110 with humid temps. Arizona is one of the greatest places on the planet earth actually!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Also, in such a dry climate, the rain doesn’t do anything except move dust around. So what is exactly the point? I actually need a climate expert to explain this to me. I don’t like it.

I mentioned to my parents I want to leave Arizona the other day. This isn’t the first or last time I mentioned it, and yet they seemed surprised every time. I guess there comes a sting when someone you love tells you they have plans to leave you someday. Imagine if your significant other told you that their time with you was temporary. It’d suck for sure. But I genuinely have a lot of scorn for this place. Everything about this place seems bad to me. The people, the weather, the atmosphere, the politics, the dating scene, the art scene. I just get tired of it here. But the unfortunate thing is I am locked here for at least a couple years. And even then I won’t have enough to be where I want to be (New York). I change my mind frequently, but I know for a fact that I just don’t want to be stuck here forever. It feels indicative to everything I have worked for. There’s something ultra depressing about being static. Stuck in the same place you’ve always been. Like purgatory or something like that. Just stagnation. I’ve never been a fan. I want to be able to move along and be best me I can be. Will New York be that place where I can do that? Probably not, but I just need to find out.